Guest post from Natalie Sisson, The Suitcase Entrepreneur. Natalie’s a Business & Social Media Coach from New Zealand, who lives and works on her own terms all over the world.
Did anyone ever tell you that your idea was not going to fly, that you couldn’t possibly do that `thing’ you were planning, and that you couldn’t have your cake and eat it too?
I seriously hope you graciously told them where to stick it.
This world is full of too many people making excuses for not living life on their own terms. Whenever people doubt your abilities or tell you something can’t be done, they are in fact projecting their own fears on to you.
Worst of all is that little voice in your mind that says those sorts of things to you on a daily basis – if you let it.
Things like `You know you’re not really good enough at this, there are far more talented people out there than you’. Or `why did you think you could charge that much, you’re not an expert, nobody will ever pay you that much’.
I know it’s hard, telling your inner critic to shut-up or your lizard brain to back off. But you absolutely have to.
There is another way
Whenever I get struck by fear, or think I can’t possibly pull something off, I simply look at my guiding values in life. For me, these are to create freedom in business and adventure in life.
Not just for myself but for my community of fellow Suitcase Entrepreneurs who look to me for inspiration and motivation on a daily basis.
Imagine if I had talked myself out of starting my business almost 2 years ago?
- I would never have had the opportunities that I’m presented with now or the thriving business I love
- I would never have had the ability to make a difference in other peoples’ lives
- Or felt the joy I get when I receive emails from people who tell me how I touched their lives or got them thinking, taking action and starting their business
I had no idea how to blog, and even though I had 10 years experience in marketing, that is completely different to online marketing and understanding the art of the internet and e-commerce.
Yet, I backed myself – or more rather gave myself no choice other than to fail fast or gloriously succeed.
Yes, I had to become accustomed to and accepting of failing – a LOT.
Each time it gets a little easier. Your ego bruises less easily, you learn the lessons from the failure and apply them to be more successful the next time.
Failure Is Your Friend
It may seem like a strange concept to you, but think about Edison who failed 1,000 times before inventing the lightbulb. Imagine not giving up on your idea despite having 1,000 failures?
Yet he knew each time that he was getting one step closer to producing something brilliant.
The thing is, anything worth doing, anything that will make you proud and make a big impact on others, is not going to be easy. It’s not just going to come to you overnight and be a breeze to implement.
Nope it’s going to take hard work, sweat, blood, tears, determination and a huge amount of self belief.
It’s going to take setbacks, cost money, and be `pooh-poohed’ by those who love you most, or others who just don’t get it (but I get it, I know your brilliance even if it’s currently a diamond in the rough).
The trick is knowing when you’re making progress towards succeeding, or if you’re flogging a dead horse.
There are times when you need to let go of your idea, especially if you really are seeing no traction in what you’re doing and it’s not a problem or challenge that many people face and actually will pay you money to solve.
That’s the only exception.
Discovering your diamond
So back to your diamond in the rough.
I love this analogy because you’d never realize what gorgeous gem was buried in cold, hard rock until you had lovingly extracted it, continued to refine and buff it and finally polish it up into a sparkling beauty.
This is what you should be doing with your life, and your business!
Each day you should be working on ways to take off those rough edges and bring out the true brilliance in you.
Some of the simple ways to do this are by
- focusing on the things you’re doing really well, and
- congratulating yourself each day for one thing you did that you’re proud of – no matter how small.
When you feel flat or like you’re not getting anywhere pull up those testimonials you’ve received or those glowing emails from customers, friends and strangers that instantly make you remember why you’re doing what you do, day in and day out.
You can even look at the meaning behind a well intentioned criticism and what you can apply from their feedback to do even better next time.
It’s looking for the nuggets of insight that will help you to know you’re on the right track, that you’re making a difference and leaving a legacy.
Baby You’re A Firework
How can you not love Katy Perry’s song `Baby you’re a firework, come on show them what you’re worth’?
It’s your time to light up the sky with your brilliance.
Now you’ve discovered your diamond and polished it up, you need to wear that bling out and show off the sparkle and bling!
I see too many people being ordinary, quashing their talents and unique abilities because they don’t want to come across as tacky, or salesy or too self promotional.
I get that, but the one thing you are responsible in this world is putting your best foot forward. You need to become an expert online marketer.
Marketing yourself is key to everything you do and you can do it in an ethical, loving and inspiring way. But quit playing small, quit hiding and quit being average.
As Marianne Williamson so rightly said:
“It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be?”
Have YOU had people try to stop you from following your dream? What did you do? Thanks for sharing!
Natalie Sisson is the Founder of The Suitcase Entrepreneur – a highly popular blog that shows entrepreneurs how to build a thriving online business they can run from anywhere. The focus is on creating freedom in business and adventure using online tools, social media and outsourcing to set up a portable business that allows you to live the lifestyle you desire.
Natalie lives and breathes what she preaches which is why she’s able to take off to Africa this March to cycle 6,445km from Nairobi to Capetown. If you’d like to follow her journey and support her mission to raise $10,000 for WomenWin.org then head to The Ride of my life.
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About Tia & Your Life YOUR Way:
Life Coach / Awesomeness Inciter + Inner Sparkle Activator Tia Sparkles offers tips, advice, community hug-a-thons to ignite your Inner Sparkle — that shimmery part of your spirit that says YES to courage + connection, and NO WAY to ‘shoulds’ + restrictions.
She loves Nutella, New Zealand, Yoda, & Sparkles.
This post motivates me and fills in the gaps when I have self doubt. Years ago as I was planning my lifetime dream of visiting Africa, my mother’s fears were vocalized and she thought we should put that money into a house. I thought at that time, if I did that, the chances of fulfilling this dream (this need) would be slim. I smiled knowing I was never more sure of anything than the need to make this trip happen. I wasn’t wrong. Now as I embark on my own business, again, I remember to embrace the fear, the doubt and refuse to give it more time and attention than it deserves. Ok to proceed practically and well thought out aware of the pitfalls, but still proceed. Thanks Natalie. Sometimes we need our briliance and its existence reiterated. Eventually it comes naturally to believe and we’ll never look back at the old thoughts that came easily. They just won’t exist.
Love your confidence and intuition but love even more that you FOLLOWED your gut, Catherine!
Catherine you’re so right. It’s all about embracing fear. Right now I feel like all the people around me are really struggling to do that. The first time is always the toughest and from there it definitely gets easier. I used to say I like to take fear out for lunch and have an honest conversation with it on a regular basis!
So glad you’re embarking on your own business and stepping into your fear.
I always say – when you’re feeling the fear, you know you’re getting closer to what you want. Flip it around! Great post, Natalie 🙂
This is so beautiful. We can never get enough reminders that we ARE worth our weight in gold and WORTHY of living our dreams to the max. I still struggle with this and have occasional bursts of brilliance followed by dark periods of gloom and self-doubt. This post is such a timely reminder that fear is merely a barrier that we CAN overcome to achieve our richest light. Thank you for sharing. Good luck on your cycling! 🙂
Otiti, that’s a normal and natural way of being. A healthy sense of self is essential to a happy life. Glad you liked Nat’s post 🙂 Rock on, superstar!
I agree with your statement that failure is a friend. It is failure that makes us persevere and to think of ways to better ourselves. It is rising from failure that best defines who we are.
Right you are, Julene! If we’re not failing, we’re not trying enough new things!
Natalie, this was brilliant. I can so relate to the fact that people project their own fears into whatever it is you’re trying to accomplish.
When I decided to drop out of college in order to build my own business doing what I loved, I faced A LOT of criticism from my family. However, I listened to myself and the last few months have been the best ones in my life. It’s all about being self-confident and believing in yourself. If you do that, not even the setbacks will crush you.
Good point about confidence, Anne-Sophie. It comes from action, not butt hugging a chair 🙂
I adore this post! I can’t get enough of positive people. I agree with her completely. I started pursuing my dreams 1 year ago this month and I have come such a long way its amazing. I am not where I need to be but I certainly am closer than I was a year ago.
Tia:
This is a great post by Natalie and I do agree that we all are brilliant diamonds in the making. Like the saying goes, “We are diamonds in the rough just needing to be mined, refined and polished-up. I have had so many human beings in my lifetime especially family and friends that told me that I could not live and work on my own terms, and yet I have gone on to do so in three different business to date. I am on my third business presently which is network marketing online. I have strengthened a characteristic of mine I like to call, Stick-ability.” Stick-ability means to me the ability to work on a dream or goal until it is reached, PERIOD! I also read inspirational and motivational information and quotes on a daily basis. As Henry Ford is quoted, “Don’t find fault, find a remedy.”
Best Regards,
Pete